Wednesday, 7 November 2012

Don't fit in, stand out!

I've always been told by mother dearest that 'The good Lord made you to stand out, not to fit in. So shine my boy, shine' and never a true word spoken. With the current spate of meet and greets with 'ScienceGirl' recently, it was now time to get approval from her mates. Now let me pause for a moment to educate the future up and coming ThunderKatts on dating Swedish women. Firstly, if her friends don't approve of you, continue finger-banging yourself to sleep while listening to classical music. Friends approval is everything over here my obnoxious online reader. Its bigger than family! Secondly, refer back to the previous statement that starts with Firstly! 

Now bearing in mind that I already made so much mistakes when 'meeting the parents' I surely didn't want to repeat the same feat again. I therefore looked in the mirror and told myself 'self you got this'. Remember; whenever there is doubt, there is no doubt! With that said, I decided to crack back a few Vodka+RedBulls and just wing it. 'ScienceGirl' was hosting a traditional Swedish dinner party with all her mates present and this was the platform for me to be introduced to her crew. Not wanting to repeat the previous week's mistake, I decided to suit up. Upon gazing in the mirror, I got flashbacks of my younger years in Mzanzi. You must suit up to church! You must wear uniform to school! You must wear blazer and tie to rugby matches! Your hair must be 2cm from your ear and collar. I got a slight repulsive and rebellious feeling and decided "fuck it, go as me and let's switch it up". 

As the first few guests arrived, I started regretting my decision but as with anything else, there is nothing that a few Vodka+RedBulls can't change. I felt a bit uneasy because my Swedish is as useful as a nun with fake tits. However, ScienceGirl's mates quickly made me feel at ease by rather interacting in English. As my confidence reached its peak, I was ready for takeoff and flight CA710 aboard Colin Airways was reaching altitude.  

I always thought that The Lad Fraternity back home rolls deep but it turns out we are not the only ThunderKatts rolling like that. Each and everyone of the 'ScienceGirl' crew rolls at least 2 degrees deep. After dinner we made our way to what can only be described as an absolute clunge fest(in the wise words of 'Botham' and the guys). It was at this point that I missed The Crew because the ratio of ladies to guys at this party was 12:1 and they would have cleaned up at this gig. 

After a few glasses of welcome bubbly, I was soon chatting to the rest of the boyfriends at the bar. Somehow my Swedish must have improved miraculously for I was not only understanding, but speaking Swedish too. In a smooth, quiet and continuous motion, I made my way towards the dance floor but not before being stopped by 'randomgirl' who yearned for me by first name. I hate when this happens because I then have to pretend that I remember names. This occurrence repeated itself numerous times throughout the evening but just with different characters. To my surprise, they were not mates of 'ScienceGirl' but merely heard of the enigma. 

I am not quite sure how the night ended but apparently according to feedback, it went well. Or like 'Botham' or 'LukeyFiasco' would say "IN". It turns out 'TheeVanessa' was right when she said "don't fit in, stand out and shine Black Diamond" 

Colin Out...

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